You know when your hopes were too high, when they are dashed to pieces and you are WAY bummed out... There is a place where healthy hope dwells, a place where dreams sore and God is still sovereign over all in your mind.... Where you REALLY really hope, desire, want some thing, or something to happen, and if it doesn't your soul is really not even terribly upset when it becomes apparant it won't.... happen the way YOU wanted... that God wanted something different....
Then there is a place where you let your hope, like a kite, go a bit to high, and when the line snaps, it really is a great disappointment. And sometimes the very fact that you ARE, as disappointed as you are, is the greatest of disappointments to you. For in that, you know that you wanted YOUR WILL TO BE DONE>>.... ugh
In that place here in MA.... with news, we are still in this place, will be in this place... and won't be home for this weekend.....
What ever is a few more days anyway???? What was so special about this weekend....
well, nothing much.....
just...
that...
Carole Joy Seid was gonna be speaking, and last year when I had tickets to her one day conference,
there was a funeral and I couldn't go....
The year before she didn't come to town, and this year....
It will be our last days....
It I suppose would have been and easier disappointment had her conference taken place in middle of the trip, but to miss it by a day or so... just stinks.... Rob had said he was trying to make it happen.... but..... Rob isn't divine, Rob is Rob....
and so my expectations were mine, unrealistic, presumptuous.... mine...
God's ways are better, wiser, and apparently, I just don't need to be there.... God doesn't want me there.....He has somewhere else better for us to be... drum rolll....... yep you guessed it that would be.....
Here....
here,
or on the road....
somewhere ....
:)
joyful in ALL things.... ugh need work on that
anyway it is DAY 46
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1 comment:
Bummer. We'll miss you.
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